With a very heavy heart I arrived home to Folsom California on June 1. I had just finished 20 months of Peace Corps Service in Azerbaijan. I didn't want to leave,! I worked with the most wonderful students in Sheki. They wanted to learn and were willing to share their dreams with me. They taught me much. I believe they will grow up and improve their country. I had a wonderful counterpart who had great ideas and was also open to hearing about ideas from the students. She welcomed me and helped me to know that Azerbaijan was my home. And, I hit the jackpot with the best Peace Corps staff. They worked very hard to support us, push us to do our very best and make us feel like they had our backs. So I left after only 20 months... not because I wanted to, but because of circumstances out of mine and Peace Corps control. And at least for me, Peace Corps did everything possible to make this painful, early leaving process as easy as possible. I am so grateful.
Whenever someone asks me what I think he should do with his life, I always say, First, leave home. Get out there, where if you care to listen, you will find many other people dreaming of making connections and changing the world, just like you. The only mistake is in thinking that you will make an important difference in the lives of the people you're among. The profound difference will be in you." Paul Theroux on the Peace Corps"
When I arrived home, there were about 30 people waiting at the airport to greet me. I was shocked and so happy to see people, to hug them, see kids older and just be "home." Peace Corps has been kind enough to give my sector the opportunity to transfer to another country. And so I will be going to the Philippines. I have completed 47 months of Peace Corps service and yet have not finished one full tour of service. (although PC has been kind enough to give us our R's") So after a week of being home, my transfer was approved. All I had to do then was to enjoy a month in California. I was able to see people, play with kids, go to 4 movies, Ride roller coaster, go in the ocean, swim daily, eat great food and catch up on sleep. I really did have a great month.
But there was that little thing of reverse culture shock. I thought that after doing this once before I may be immune to reverse culture shock. WRONG. I struggled... again. I was sad to leave Azerbaijan early and just wanted to talk about the 20 month experience... all the good and the bad. But as I seemed to forget from last time, it wasnt just my life that moved on. Everyone at home... their life moved on also. I was at times the relative who comes over and wants to show you 500 pictures of their vacation and share each one in vivid detail. Pretty quick, for some people I would notice eyes glazing over and very understandably wanting to move on. And I get it. They've had life happen to them too... good and bad. I get it!!! But unfortunately to move on, I needed to talk... and I needed people to listen.
I was very blessed. There were some very wonderful people who listened, looked me in the eye and asked great questions. And then they honored me by answering my questions about what has happened in their lives... in their family's lives. And that has been..... so wonderful. To all those people, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you!!! And to the Staffords... words can not express my heart to your generosity and kindness through the years. Love ya.
Im sitting in a hotel in Los Angeles with about 10 minutes to go before the staging begins for the Philippines. I'm so excited to be able to serve again. But Im also sad to leave home again.... wondering a little if it will still be home when I return. Always afraid of losing the best in my life.
So to close the Azerbaijan chapter and begin the new adventure, here are some words shared by my country director from Azerbaijan. They say it all:
""Like many people who have been affected by such an experience in a distant land, I did not come all the way home; nor did I leave that experience behind. It stayed in my mind, it informed my decisions, it made me strong. To all of this, there are people who will say, "What's the point?" But those are the same people who'll say what's the point of writing a poem, or learning a language, or going for a hike, or lingering on a wooded path to watch a bird flash onto a branch.
Whenever someone asks me what I think he should do with his life, I always say, First, leave home. Get out there, where if you care to listen, you will find many other people dreaming of making connections and changing the world, just like you. The only mistake is in thinking that you will make an important difference in the lives of the people you're among. The profound difference will be in you." Paul Theroux on the Peace Corps"
